Wednesday, July 18, 2007

It's a slippery slope we climb

I have been doing so well. I haven't really thought about him too much and I don't jump and run when he calls. I was moving on. I thought I had moved on. And I got cocky. I thought...Wow! Look at me! I don't need him! Why was I so interested?! He is so not worth my time. And that's when it hits you. It blindsides you like a freight train. You had no idea it was coming because, "you are so over him"...duh!

I haven't really seen or talked to him a ton lately and I wasn't obsessing over it either, which is the surprising factor here. But he said something the other night and there was a look and i just can't get it out of my head. I keep replaying it in my mind and wondering over and over and over again - what did he mean? Was he going to say more? What is wrong with me?

Although, in my defense I will say this...the obsessive thinking and wondering is not to the fever pitch that it was before. It's more of a mellow obsessive thought process. I wonder what he meant by that but not enough to really dig for more information. If it happens to come up in conversation again, sure I may try to finagle more information out of him, but I'm not going to force the topic. I still have a tender spot in my heart for him. I wish i didn't but the truth of the matter is, I do and i guess i probably always will.

This blows.

6 comments:

Sue said...

Awwwww. I know I don't know you Kelly, but you remind me a lot of myself. (Myself 10 years ago, but you get what I mean.) Even with the rather cryptic description and my total lack of knowledge of the who/what/when/where/why, I seriously know exactly where you are at right now. Big internet hugs for you...

Sue said...

I mean, I don't know you that WELL. Because, um, I know you. I mean, we're related. (Sigh. I'm so retarded sometimes.)

Wendy said...

I'm laughing at Sue's second comment, but I'm so sad for you. Come over and we'll eat yummy carb-laden food (Screw your doctor. Some things call for carbs.) and sing "I Will Survive" until we're hoarse.

Wendy said...

I'm serious.

Wendy said...

NEW POST!

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