Mea culpa

I am totally and completely failing at the whole don't be a sappy over-sharer on social media. Sorry guys...total fail. Mea culpa.

After the melt down of yesterday I had a nice chat with Lisa and we both are very happy that we're going through this wedding/newlywed thing sort of together. Vlad asked me last week if I thought I'd be getting married so close to Lisa and I honestly didn't, but I'm very glad that I am!!

Vlad came home from work today after having a rough day and I was definitely in need of some cheering, so we went on a date. It wasn't anything fancy or anything but it was so nice to go out together and just spend time together. We went to dinner at Qdoba...side note - why has this delicious Mexican Grill not found its way to Utah?? It seems like it would be a no-brainer. Anyway, after dinner we went to check out the various family plans on our respective cell phone carriers, because hellooooo, we're going to be a family! How's that for a reality check??

We then worked on our registry...yeah...that was fun. I had some guilt over some of the larger items... Kitchenaid Mixer and things like that. Vlad and I were walking through and looking at the various items and talking about what we would actually use and it hit me...I'm getting married. Like...seriously. I'm getting married. I have friends offering to throw be bridal showers. People are going to buy me stuff...lots of stuff. Vlad and I are going to be husband and wife...eep!! As this reality check was happening, I turned to look at him and thought to myself...that's right. You're marrying that goober... but he's your goober.

After some serious retail therapy/window shopping, we went and got ice cream.

His "why you take my picture...I eat ice cream" face

His "yeeeeah...she's going to take another picture" face

His...yeah...he's just a goofball

I'm thinking, "Yay! I didn't cut his face off!!"

Aaaand his phone had the better quality

Good Golly, Ms. Molly!

This may be a record for me on this old blog. It's a bit dusty, yes? Well, gentleman #3 and I did date for a brief little while. Things got pretty serious fairly quickly. And, as many things do when they develop quickly, once I was able to catch up to what was really happening around me, I realized this was not the relationship for me. I hope he finds what he wants, unfortunately, that was not me. So, I am still on the hunt for my Betty (as in Betty Crocker Brownie - you can credit Lisa with that one!)

School started almost four weeks ago and it's so crazy to think that! We're slowly coming out of the honeymoon phase and starting to show our true colors to each other. My 8th period somehow managed to get me to teach for almost 45 minutes using a ridiculous southern accent. Okay, let's be honest, it didn't take too much convincing. I'm surprised by how well they actually listened. My 3rd and 7th periods are a trial. I am doing my best to be kind yet firm. It's hard when you just want to knock their heads together.

Creative writing has been fun, but I think the novelty is wearing off for some of them and they're ready to be done with it. Unfortunately for them, they still have half a year of the class before they're done with me. It's a mixed grade class, so it's given me a chance to get to know students that aren't in 9th grade. I've been with the 9th graders since I started and they were in 7th grade. Each year I've changed what grade I teach. I think, I hope, I've settled on 9th grade. I'm really enjoying it. For the most part, I love my students and haven't had any serious dust-ups.

I've gotten some wonderful feedback from admins and district level folks that have popped into our school for various reasons. It balances out how horrible I feel after I leave my ESL class. The class itself isn't the most interesting or engaging but it covers a myriad of strategies for English Language Learners in my classroom. Considering how the vast majority of my students fall into this category on some level, these are strategies I should be using. Suffice to say, I need to do better.

In other random tidbits...

• One of my students insists I look like UFC Fighter Miesha Tate. If you're like me and had no idea who she is, here's a visual. Other than the fact that we're both women and have long hair, I don't see it. (And yes, that is super red carpet in my classroom)

• Lisa came for a quick weekend visit. Yay! I love it when Lisa comes. We saw Austenland and The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones. Both were a lot of fun in completely different ways. I read Austenland after I had my surgery in 2007-ish (?). I don't remember it being as funny. It also doesn't hurt that this manly hunk of beauty plays one of the heroes. Go see it!
  
• I'm so happy that it's finally cooling down a bit! No A/C 90+ weather and no windows/outside doors, makes for a very hot, hot, hot classroom!

Dating...the dessert buffet of life

Being a single twenty-something (almost 30), I've met and dated my fair share of men. This most recent bout has got me thinking about the type of man that I would like to date. There are currently three guys...well, now two, but at the time of this metaphor there were three...that I was talking to and possibly going on dates with. Each one of them fits neatly into a different dessert. I shared this with Shannon and she thought it quite fitting.

Gentleman #1 is Vanilla ice cream. He's dependable yet unexciting. Vanilla ice cream is nice on a brownie or with lots of chocolate sauce or whipped cream. Yet, alone vanilla ice cream is a tad on the boring side. Vanilla (the gentleman in question) doesn't inspire excitement. We've actually been talking on and off for almost six months and we're just now getting around to going on a date. And let me tell you, it has taken far more logistical planning to get this date together than it typically does for me to get ready for the school year. And I think part of what makes him Vanilla ice cream is that he, himself, doesn't seem too excited about our date.

Gentleman #2 is a decadent, fancy bakery brownie. He is, incidentally, not in the picture anymore. At first you are dazzled by this brownie. It's got a fancy wrapper with a frilly edge! It maybe has a chocolate shaving garnish or a fancy gold leaf decoration. It invariably comes wrapped in a shiny cellophane wrapper with a ribbon. You pay a ridiculous amount of money for said brownie because you think, "Anything that fancy or expensive has GOT to be delicious". Unfortunately, after you've eaten the entire brownie because "dang it! You spent $10 on that sucker!", you sit back and think: "Did I really just spend all those calories on that?" I think that's enough said about gentleman #2.

I haven't quite classified gentleman #3 just yet. I have a sneaking suspicion about what he will be, but the jury's still out.

I know the kind of guy I'm looking for is a Betty Crocker Brownie mix brownie. These brownies are deceptively delicious. I have been known to just go at them with a fork. This beauty of this brownie is, you can find it in any grocery store. It's in an unassuming box. It's nothing fancy, but it never fails to put a smile on my face. 

Signs...

Signs that you may or may not have given up on the dating scene for the foreseeable future:

1. You become irrationally angry at the radio for playing such sappy love songs as "I Knew You Were Trouble" by Taylor Swift,  "When I was Your Man" by Bruno Mars, "Good Stuff" by Kenny Chesney (who I really don't like on a good day!).

2. You have to suppress the urge to chuck your hymn book at the lovely couple two rows in front of you at church.

3. As Lisa would say, "You are going to a play tonight where you could potentially see the guy you've been flirting with, and you're wearing five different shades of green." I've sort of given up on trying to impress.

4. Roll my eyes at coworkers discuss their upcoming wedding.

5. Would rather spend the night in with my grading and netflix than go be social.


It's been a rough six months or so for me. I've been on a lot of first dates with good men and they haven't progressed beyond that. I've told myself it's because we weren't right for each other and that's true. But it's often easier to tell myself that there's something wrong with me. No one ever tells you what a toll dating can take on your self-esteem. Even if you're not being horrifically rejected, going on a constant stream of first dates gets old. It's exhausting and after a while you start to wonder what's wrong with you.

So, in an attempt to prevent the bitterness from taking up permanent residence in my head and heart, I have hereby declaring a hiatus from dating. I have no idea for how long, but I just need to take a step back and remember a time where it was just fun to spend time with new and interesting people.

The bright lights of broadway...across America!

First this on Friday...



Then this on the 15th in Cedar City!



Then this unexpected treat on the 16th....



And finally, because I have the coolest roommate and friend ever, this one in September in Boise...



I am so freaking excited for all of these!

Adventures in dating...

A big part of being a single twenty-something is dating...more so for others than for me. However, I have dated a variety of "gentlemen" (we're using that term quite loosely, here). I've had some really great experiences, some horribly awkward and uncomfortable experiences and some downright horrible experiences. Last weekend I went on a date that fully justified and supported every judgmental thought people have about online dating. Yes, I'm doing the online dating thing. I do not defend or explain it. It just is. (I should probably insert a little disclaimer here. I'm feeling a bit prickly today. Which, I realize is not the best time to be blogging but here we are.) 

Anyway, back to my date. We'll call him Jack. Jack and I had been emailing for a while, texting and talking on the phone. He is from Texas, has a delightful southern drawl and made me laugh more than any other guy in the past. We had great chemistry and I was pretty excited when he asked me out on a date. Turns out that this charming southern gentleman is actually a self-proclaimed homophobe, an advocate of corporal punishment in schools and saw no problem, whatsoever, with the use of the "n" word. Needless to say, it wasn't going to happen between us. The quirky, appropriate jokes of our previous conversations had been traded in for crude bathroom humor and inappropriate stories. I just kept asking myself...who is this guy???  He also lived at home with his parents, did not have a college degree and didn't want to put forth the effort to get into shape after being warned by his doctor he needed to. 

This takes us to today. The last two guys I have gone out with fit the same description. I will tell you, Jack definitely took home the Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde Award, that's for dang sure. However, both men were 34, living at home with the parents, no college education, talked about dreams of a real career but had taken no steps to actually achieve it and had no drive beyond the next day. Now, I'm not saying that I am the best thing to happen since sliced bread but really...? I mean, seriously?!

Girl's just wanna have fun...

I'm what one would call a "late bloomer". I rarely, if ever, dated in high school. I was asked to the dances by guy friends or it was girl's choice. I was never the first girl asked to the dance. In fact, I was more than once, a guy's 'back up' date. I didn't go to my junior prom and spent my senior prom avoiding my date. I dallied with inappropriate relationships (we're talking parolees, gang members and burn outs - what can I say, I had thing for the bad boys). I now think it is a miracle that I didn't end up in serious trouble.

College wasn't much better. I had my first ever bonafide boyfriend for all of about three weeks at the very beginning of freshman year. After that I didn't date...at all. I had a run in with a NCMO (if you don't know what that is google it) end of my junior year. However, seeing as how I was desperately in love with his cousin that was dating a friend, who just happened to be spending the semester abroad...the trend of inappropriate men continued.

Since then I've dated closet cases, a schizophrenic, megalomaniacs, egomaniacs, commitment-phobics...and the list goes on. It sounds like I date a lot but this has been spread over the course of six or seven years. I didn't date a lot until fairly recently and really, it's only a lot in comparison to my fairly empty dating history.

The guys in my most recent past haven't been perfect but then, neither am I. And I mean really, if a guy doesn't have a skeleton in his closet, he's got a Bertha in the attic. (if you don't know the reference...seriously, go read a book! OR go check out pinterest.com) We're all just trying to find the one that is the same kind of crazy.

I have a blind date tomorrow...my first, in fact. Lots of dating lately...lots of dating.

It's exhausting....

Kids say the darndest things...

It was Easter Sunday so the family came up to my parents and we did hamburgers and chicken on the grill. The grand kids did a little Easter Egg hunt in the backyard (so cute!) and we all just hung out. It was a really nice evening/afternoon. I was outside playing catch with my niece and nephew and Lauren was talking about how she played football at school and all that fun stuff. Then Logan chimes in with, "Kelly, you're taking a long time to find someone to marry." I stare at him and start laughing and he continues, "You should hurry up." He then went on to talk about his other aunt (my sister in-law's sister) and how she was old and not married. I can't remember how the conversation ended but yeah. I actually think it's pretty funny. So if you all know of any single, eligible bachelors...send 'em my way because my 7 year old nephew thinks I need to hurry up and get married!

The offending child...and he seems so sweet, doesn't he?

Maturity and a few Girl Scout cookies

So last night was the "conversation". As I sat there listening to him talk I realized that I didn't want to tell him how I felt. I didn't want to go there. I don't want all the drama that would ensue. Sorry...not interested. I'll be his friend...his good friend. I don't want to deal with the flirting and the nasty looks from girls, the scowls, flippant remarks and general cattyness. I realized something very important last night. All these girls are going to come and go. They'll float in and out of our lives but until "the one" shows up, they're all variables. I don't want to be a variable. I want to be a constant. At the end of the day, when all the drama is going on and people are being stupid, who do you go to...? your friends and i know that's not always going stay the same either but for now, friendship is better than a relationship. I'm going to try to be a better person and get to know whatever girl is "in favor" at the moment because he's right....I'm not going anywhere.


Being "mature" is so much easier when you have a box of Thin Mint Girl Scout Cookies sitting on your desk.