Wednesday, October 8, 2008

What if...

We all have those crossroad points in our life where if we had made a different choice our life would be very different right now. Do you ever think of the "what if"? What if you had taken that job somewhere else or hadn't gone to this school or dated that guy/girl. I am of a mind that all the choices we make are the choices we needed to make and no matter the outcome, it was for our good. If it was a bad outcome, then it was a lesson we needed to learn and, if we're smart, we won't make the same mistake again. That's the way I usually think but lately I guess you could say that I've been dwelling on the 'what if's' of my life.

The biggest what if I can is how would my life be different if I had moved to LA with Katy and Sara like I was planning last fall? I talked with Sara a couple of weeks ago and she's doing so well and having so much fun. She's still teaching full time at the two Orthodox Jewish High Schools but she's also been co-writing with another teacher she works with on screenplays/tv scripts. She is currently casting for a tv pilot for a show that she is the associate producer for......yeah. You read that right. She's only 24 and she's an associate producer for a tv pilot show that has sparked a lot of interest in a couple of networks. She's dating someone, living in a beautiful home in the Burbank Hills. Sounds pretty great, no? She and Katy have fun and hang out. They go to the set of Scrubs and have parties.

Now, in my heart of hearts, I know that I made the right choice in staying in SLC. More than the obvious reason that I needed surgery, there were more important reasons that I needed to stay in SLC but I still can't help but wonder about how my life would be different if I did move to LA. Life isn't all flowers and sunshine right now. It's hard and it's stressful and it's dark. I have to fight the urge to bolt. I know my life wouldn't be perfect in LA and I know that Sara's life isn't perfect and she's not me and she deserves absolutely everything she has gotten (and more!) but I can't help but wonder....what if....?



Sara and I at our Graduation Morning Brunch.

6 comments:

Wendy said...

Oh man, I feel your pain. That is one of the things that I always get caught up in- what if, what if, what if? It helps me to look at it and say, "okay let's look at what if" and not just look at the fantasy outcome, but also consider the bad things that could have happened, even if they're crazy and outlandish and not all that likely, because usually the fantasy version is pretty unlikely, too. That usually helps brings me back down to earth. That and doing something to get me out of my own head. I can seriously get lost for weeks in there, and once I get out, things are a bit clearer.

Damien said...

What if is a bad bad place... it is a place that lives only in our minds and too often it looks better than where we are... I stay away from that place, because I have way too many reasons to be happy with where I actually am.

Rather than visit "what if" I like visiting "what can be"... it's real and ultimately if you dream it up and make it happen it is infinitely more satisfying than "what if"!

Oh... and here is some cheap marketing for me:)

http://www.hopesdreamsandhiccups.blogspot.com

Woo hoo!!!

Ashley said...

Can we remove 'what ifs' and 'should'ves' from our lives :) I miss you!!!

mom2nine said...

The "what if"s seem to raise their heads when we are dissatisfied with the present. I try to remember that "all things work together for the good of them that believe." It is all a learning process, sometimes slow and painful...worth it in the end we have hope.

I LOVE YOU said...

AV,無碼,a片免費看,自拍貼圖,伊莉,微風論壇,成人聊天室,成人電影,成人文學,成人貼圖區,成人網站,一葉情貼圖片區,色情漫畫,言情小說,情色論壇,臺灣情色網,色情影片,色情,成人影城,080視訊聊天室,a片,A漫,h漫,麗的色遊戲,同志色教館,AV女優,SEX,咆哮小老鼠,85cc免費影片,正妹牆,ut聊天室,豆豆聊天室,聊天室,情色小說,aio,成人,微風成人,做愛,成人貼圖,18成人,嘟嘟成人網,aio交友愛情館,情色文學,色情小說,色情網站,情色,A片下載,嘟嘟情人色網,成人影片,成人圖片,成人文章,成人小說,成人漫畫,視訊聊天室,a片,AV女優,聊天室,情色,性愛

somebody said...

酒店經紀人,菲梵酒店經紀,酒店經紀,禮服酒店上班,酒店小姐,便服酒店經紀,酒店打工,酒店寒假打工,酒店經紀,酒店經紀,專業酒店經紀,合法酒店經紀,酒店暑假打工,酒店兼職,便服酒店工作,酒店打工經紀,制服酒店經紀,專業酒店經紀,合法酒店經紀,酒店暑假打工,酒店兼職,便服酒店工作,酒店打工,酒店經紀,制服酒店經紀,酒店經紀