What if...

We all have those crossroad points in our life where if we had made a different choice our life would be very different right now. Do you ever think of the "what if"? What if you had taken that job somewhere else or hadn't gone to this school or dated that guy/girl. I am of a mind that all the choices we make are the choices we needed to make and no matter the outcome, it was for our good. If it was a bad outcome, then it was a lesson we needed to learn and, if we're smart, we won't make the same mistake again. That's the way I usually think but lately I guess you could say that I've been dwelling on the 'what if's' of my life.

The biggest what if I can is how would my life be different if I had moved to LA with Katy and Sara like I was planning last fall? I talked with Sara a couple of weeks ago and she's doing so well and having so much fun. She's still teaching full time at the two Orthodox Jewish High Schools but she's also been co-writing with another teacher she works with on screenplays/tv scripts. She is currently casting for a tv pilot for a show that she is the associate producer for......yeah. You read that right. She's only 24 and she's an associate producer for a tv pilot show that has sparked a lot of interest in a couple of networks. She's dating someone, living in a beautiful home in the Burbank Hills. Sounds pretty great, no? She and Katy have fun and hang out. They go to the set of Scrubs and have parties.

Now, in my heart of hearts, I know that I made the right choice in staying in SLC. More than the obvious reason that I needed surgery, there were more important reasons that I needed to stay in SLC but I still can't help but wonder about how my life would be different if I did move to LA. Life isn't all flowers and sunshine right now. It's hard and it's stressful and it's dark. I have to fight the urge to bolt. I know my life wouldn't be perfect in LA and I know that Sara's life isn't perfect and she's not me and she deserves absolutely everything she has gotten (and more!) but I can't help but wonder....what if....?

Sara and I at our Graduation Morning Brunch.

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