I got this in an email and these are actual transcripts from a courtroom. I was cracking up at my desk. (My apologies to any lawyers, future lawyers or those who are related to a lawyer)
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Uh...I was gettin' laid!
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Are you kidding me? Your Honour, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.