Week one of the rest of my life...

Last week was the first full week of the new year. It's been so great to start from the beginning and set up my expectations from the get-go. I also have had time to set up my classroom, physically, the way I want it. I have no illusions that this upcoming year isn't going to be difficult, however, I am really going to enjoy it.

I've spent the week getting to know my students and we started our first unit by the end of the week. I'm teaching 8th and 9th grade this year. It's been a challenge to plan two different curriculums (what's the plural of curriculum? Curriculi? Curriculea??) and transition between 8th and 9th grade students. I have found that I can't be quite as laid back with my 8th graders. They need a bit more structure than I need with my 9th graders.

I'm tough and I expect a lot from all my students. At first, I'm not sure they knew what to do with me, but I'm pretty certain that by the end of the week, they realized that we'd all help each other and they'd be fine.

By the end of the week I was absolutely exhausted and was ready to sleep the weekend away. But, I did come away from it so excited and thrilled that I have a job that I love!

My classroom!

Adventures in Teaching

Today marks my first full week of teaching in an honest-to-goodness, paid teaching job. Thursday was my first day on my own (I was transitioning the long-term sub out) and it was...rough. It's an inner-city school and they may be 7th graders, but they are tough kids. My first day I sent three kids to the office and one of them ended up getting suspended. There is a lot of posturing and pushing the boundaries. Their previous teacher had a personal crisis come up and left, then they had various subs come in and out before they got a long term sub that worked. And here I come, less than 30 days of school left and I want them to work!? The horror! Needless to say, it's been a bit rocky. But it ended on a pretty good note. One of the toughest students actually apologized to me at the end of the day on Friday.

This is by far the most difficult thing I have ever taken on. Yet, they're already becoming my students. They're loud-mouth brats sometimes, but they're just kids. Most of them just want someone to listen to them and care about them.

Today in advisory the student that was suspended asked if he could talk to me. In my head I was like...great, what now? But he actually just wanted to ask if he could be my TA (teacher assistant). I'm not entirely sure he isn't just setting me up for something but we'll see. All in all, it's been a difficult week but I'm happy where I am. They definitely don't give an inch, that's for sure. But then again...I won't either.

I *MUST* be crazy...

That's the only possible explanation, really. My to-do list seems to be getting shorter but the few things I've added lately are doozies! I was able to remove "find a job" (yay!) but I added "start new job" and "pack apartment" and "move to Layton" in its place. My mom is surely reading this and saying, "I told you to wait until after you graduate to move!" She's right. She did tell me that and she has a valid point. You see, I have this wonderful habit of moving at the worst possible moment. For example, I moved a week after having MAJOR surgery. This time last year I was moving during finals while sick AND planning a bridal shower for a dear friend. So it would seem par for the course that I would move while finishing my Masters and starting a new job...right?

The good news is we have found an apartment. And when I say "we", I really mean Lisa. I told her that since I chose such a winner of an apartment the last go around (and I'm crazy busy) she could chose the next place. We looked at a couple of places together and we some some....interesting...stuff. Our new place is in Layton and is part of a bigger complex. Yay for 24 hour maintenance!

We really could have waited until after I was done with school but I didn't really feel like driving to Ogden every day until the end of May for my new job. (Did I mention I got a new job? Because, I did. I'm a teacher!)

All in all, I'm just praying that I can make it through the next couple of weeks and then survive the rest of the school year. I'm excited but also completely terrified. I know I can do this. However, I also know this is going to be a trial by fire.

Thank you so much to those of you who have offered your support and offers of help. I appreciate it more than I can say. The diet coke runs, loads of laundry, making sure I eat (I'm like a toddler sometimes, I know), laughing with me when I wanted to cry, letting me cry, girls night out and girls night in. Really...all of it. You're all so wonderful!

Reasons to be happy on this somewhat gloomy looking Monday morning

1. So glad the sunburn is fading...not peeling or pealing. Either would be gross and awkward.

2. Get to go see Harry Potter tonight with some fun peeps.

3. Slept through the night without waking up...I know, sounds like a new born baby update but seeing as how i haven't been sleeping well for about two weeks, this was a very welcome change.

4. Looking forward to a fun picnic with the tiny humans on Friday. I forgot how much I love Liberty park.

5. Finally got an answer to a nagging question and feel pretty good.

6. I have left over Empanadas for lunch today...Yum!

7. Duet with Lisa has been performed without any major hiccups...croaking notes, passing out or bursts of tears.

8. Clean room!

9. New friends are fun

10. Did I mention I'm going to see Harry Potter tonight....?

The Adjustment Bureau

No...not the movie, although that is a very good flick. I highly recommend it if you haven't seen it already.

I am simply learning to adjust my expectations. It's not easy and I have to remind myself daily, if not hourly, but I'm trying.

By Jove I think I've got it!

I think I may have figured out a way to move abroad after graduation and get around the pesky work visa thing and most of the other little details that overwhelmed me. I could apply to teach at a DoD (Department of Defense) school. I googled teaching abroad and it was one of the first links listed. I looked at the different requirements needed and once I graduate, I'd definitely be qualified. I have no idea how competitive it is or if my single status would be a hindrance or a benefit. No idea...but it's definitely something to keep in mind.

I know the undergrads can apply to student teach at a DoD school and students from Westminster have actually been accepted. Graduates can't because we have a required travel experience and the DoD required student teaching is 10 weeks and I wouldn't be back in time from the DoD placement.

I won't say for sure this is what I'm going to do because a lot can happen in a year, but it is definitely something I'm going to keep in mind as I get closer to graduation.

Missed opportunities...?

I fell in love with London when I spent about ten days there in 2006. I love the energy, the history, the beauty of the city. While standing in the tiny kitchen of the rented flat, I told my mom that I was going to live in London someday, somehow. Once upon a time I wanted to study at the University of London. While visiting, my mom and I even went to the admissions office to talk about what would be needed. I could probably get in, I just got scared by the cost and all the logistics of getting over there and I never followed through.

While looking for jobs and trying to figure out what to do with myself, I set up an account on a website called LondonJobs. It's basically the British version of Monsterjobs. The tricky part about getting a job in England is that your employer has to apply for the work visa, so I couldn't save up, move over and then find a job. It never came to anything because I wasn't actually ready to make that terrifying leap.

Today I got an email from LondonJobs saying they could send email alerts about applicable jobs so I "wouldn't miss out on missed opportunities". It's got me thinking. Could I? Obviously, not until after I'm done with school...but really. Could I?

Oh sweet freedom!

As of 8:00 MST tonight, I am officially done with the semester from hell. I'm giddy with excitement and yet there is still some residual anxiety left over...phantom anxiety, as it were. I keep thinking I need to do something and I have to remind myself that no, Kelly, there's nothing left to be done. It's okay to veg and just take it easy for a while.

I've been thinking about the past semester, particularly my Special Education classes. It's made me question if I want to continue with SpEd or go a different route. I loved my general education classes and my middle school placement, but my elementary SpEd placement was torture for so many reason. Remember this? Well, my last day in the class my mentor teacher tells me she doesn't feel she can write an evaluation or sign my time sheet. There was all kinds of drama that I won't go into but it was just one more thing to deal with. I know, that dealing with this person shouldn't reflect on the content and methods of SpEd but I'm having a VERY difficult time separating the two.

I'm trying to figure out the best way to get where I want and need to be after I graduate. I know I need something to set me apart from all the other secondary english teachers looking for jobs but I'm not sure if SpEd is the way to go...for me. Then again...maybe I just need some time away from it and it's really where I want to end up.

...BUT for now, I'm not going to worry about it. I'm just going to worry about sleeping in, finishing unpacking boxes and hanging pictures, spending time with my family and regaining a social life. I haven't had one of those in almost a year! I may have even forgot how that works...

Any who...here's to survival!!

Dreamland

I had a dream last night that as part of my observation hours at Clayton Middle school I had to teach a dance class. It wasn't in the dance studio but rather in the gym. When we got to the gym the lacrosse team was practicing (Clayton doesn't have a lacrosse team), there were chairs set up in half the gym and the other half had a runway stage setup. Then as I was having the class stretch a bit I discovered that I couldn't remember which song I had chosen or the first 16 counts of the dance I had planned. I kept staring at the track lists and playing random songs hoping I would remember the song and the choreography... All while the mentor teacher and my professor were furiously writing notes on their clipboards.

Do you think I'm anxious about teaching tomorrow???

Dreamin large...

So dreams. Are they just flights of fancy that we get to live while asleep? Are they the deepest desires of our hearts? Is there any significance to what we dream? How we dream? When we dream? Are the dreams that we can remember in great detail more important than the ones we can only remember shadows and impressions?

And what about nightmares? what do those mean? do they mean anything? Growing up I used to have reoccurring nightmares about wolves, bears and other wild animals coming down from the mountains and attacking my family. I also had dreams about rabid dogs. And there's the infamous pink cow with purple polka-dots. I don't remember this one, but apparently it used to terrify me. I bet Freud would have a field day with that one!

I've had some pretty strange dreams lately...well strange to me anyway. They're messing with my head. Do they really mean anything or is it just my mind playing mean tricks on me?